


The Vow II

by Obliviouschyld



Category: GOT7
Genre: Angst, Brain Injury, Childhood Sweethearts, Fluffy, Friendship, Heartache, Heartbreak, Inspired by the movie The Vow, Lovers, a whole lot of feels, finding self, finding yourself
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-04-03
Packaged: 2019-04-17 20:11:32
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 15,004
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14196828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Obliviouschyld/pseuds/Obliviouschyld
Summary: A story inspired by the movie The Vow.Who is Jackson and Mark?They are two boys who met, grew up and fell in love in Seoul.When did Jackson meet Mark?They met on the 3rd of July 1999.Where did Jackson meet Mark?Jackson’s first day in kindergarten, at the sandbox.How did Jackson meet Mark?Jackson approached the quiet Mark and decided that he would make him his first friend in Seoul.Why did Jackson approach Mark?Jackson would say it’s because he had never seen such a pretty person in his life, after his mother.What happened to Jackson and Mark?This is their story.





	The Vow II

**Author's Note:**

> Songs in this order:-
> 
> I can't make you love me- Bonnie Rait
> 
> Could- Brian McKnight
> 
> I Do- 98 degress

**** Jackson and Mark met when they were in the kindergarten. Mark was six and Jackson was five. Jackson had just move into the neighbourhood and had just been enrolled into where Mark was. Jackson had always been an outgoing person ever since he was a child. He saw that Mark was playing all alone in the sandbox, so he decided that Mark will be his first friend. He walks up to the sandbox and sticks out his hand.

“Hi, I’m Jackson Wang Jia Er. What’s your name?”

Mark was caught by surprise. He had always been a quiet child and was always alone. So when Jackson walks up to him, he was a bit bewildered.

“Can you talk?” Jackson looks at Mark curiously.

Mark frowns. It wasn’t the first time he heard that but from a child who looks younger than him, it annoyed him.

“Of course I can talk,” crossing his little arms in front of him.

Jackson broke out into the biggest smile that Mark has ever seen and his whole face just lights up. Ever since he was that young, Mark thought Jackson has the nicest smile he had ever seen. 

“Let’s be friends!” Jackson clapping his hands with glee.

Mark nods and sticks out his hand at Jackson.

“I’m Mark Tuan Yi En.”

“You are chinese too?” Jackson staring at Mark with his large eyes.

Mark couldn’t help but to notice how round Jackson’s eyes were and how it lights up when he looks at Mark. Mark like his eyes. It reminds him of his puppy, Kitsune. Mark couldn’t help but puff his chest a little, feeling proud of his heritage.

“Yes I am.”

“Me too!” as Jackson jumps up and down with glee.

“Let’s be best friends Yien,” Jackson adds.

“Okay Jiaer.”

 

They were in different classes because of Jackson registered late but they made sure that as soon as the recess bell ring, Jackson would wait for Mark by the sandbox. It was like as if it was their place. Mark on the other hand would be nervous as he wasn’t sure if he would see Jackson but he was assured when he sees him every single day by the sandbox without fail. One day, while they were running around in the playground, Mark fell and scraped his knee. He was crying. It was Jackson who called for the teacher and he accompanied Mark to see the school nurse. He held his hand and never let go, saying reassuring words to his best friend.

“It’s okay En En. Miss Nurse will make it all better. Don’t cry. I’m here.”

Mark nods and was sniffling. After the nurse put on a bandaid over his knee, Mark felt better. 

“Thank you Jia Jia.”

Jackson turns to look at his best friend and cups his face, “I’m going to marry you when I grow up so that I can protect you, always.”

Jackson then kisses him on the forehead. Marks nods at the determine look of his best friend. He sticks out his pinky at Jackson. Jackson smiles and links his pinky with his. That was it. It was as if the pinky swear sealed their friendship forever, like a binding contract. They had been together ever since. They were thick as thieves. Even their parents became best friends because of those two.

 

Anyone could see that they were total opposites, even as a child. They were as different as day and night. Mark was quiet while Jackson, not so. Mark prefers to sit down quietly or play by himself while Jackson loves running around with his new found friends. Mark was more reserve between those two while Jackson is able to chat up with anybody, including those older than him. Adults find Jackson endearing when he tries to join in their discussion. Mark on the other hand was so quiet that sometimes adults forgets he is there until Jackson points out him to them. Even when they were that young, Jackson tries to make sure that Mark doesn’t feel left out. He makes sure that people knows his best friend is there with him.

“This is my best friend Mark.”

The adults find Mark very polite and courteous. Mark is an extreme introvert while Jackson is an extreme extrovert. Total at the opposite ends of everything and anything that they do. So, it was quite baffling even for their parents to see the both of them being as close as they can be. Maybe it’s true, opposites attract. Like Yin and Yang. Regardless their personalities, they seem to mash well together and they balance each other out. For that, their parents were grateful, especially Mark’s. His parents were worried that he would remain a loner as he is a very shy and quiet child. So, when Mark came home, hand in hand with another little boy name Jackson, they were quite surprised. Ever since then, he had wiggled his way into their house and heart just like how Mark wiggled his way into Jackson’s parent’s house and heart.

 

 

Up till high school, they were in the same class. But when they reach university, it was obvious that they had different aspirations. Mark decided to take up business while Jackson, mass communications. So that was how they met their little group. It was an interesting match of different type of people. Mark brought in Jinyoung and Jaebum, whom he has some classes with. They were more mature and more serious, kind of like him. Jackson on the other hand brought in a noisy bunch that he met in different classes and even clubs like Youngjae, who loves to sing and could be louder than him in terms of sound, and Bam Bam and Yugyeom whom he dubs the siamese twins. They were always together. So when the other people looks at them, they would say they were a really mash up bunch of people but them seem to match. They were all seated at one of the tables under the tree to have lunch together. It was a rare occasion where their schedules match up. It was every Friday afternoon. 

“Youngjae stop stealing my fries!” Jackson glaring at the laughing otter.

He then turns to Mark and whine, “En En, Youngjae is stealing my fries.”

Mark looks at both of them and continues eating.

“Yah! Tuan Yi En!” which made the elder laugh.

“There is nothing I can do Jacks,” shrugging at his best friend.

Jackson then turns to Jinyoung, “Eomma.”

Jinyoung smiles and pushes his fries to Jackson which made the younger smile, “You can have mine.”

“Brat,” was all Jaebum says.

“You’re just jealous, hyung,” Jackson sticking his tongue at Jaebum.

Yugyeom and Bam Bam was laughing at all of them.

“Jackson hyung is always turning to Mark hyung first when he knows that Mark hyung won’t do anything,” tease Bam Bam.

Jackson glares at Bam Bam which made the younger laugh even more.

“Bams, of course he would ask his other half first,” Yugyeom wiggling his eyebrows at Jackson and Mark.

“Don’t be jealous,” as Jackson winks at the both of them while wrapping his arm around Mark’s waist.

Mark wiggles his eyebrows at the both of them as well.

“Euwww,” both Yugyeom and Bam Bam said at the same time which made the whole gang laugh.

“You should know when to give up maknaes,” Jaebum teases.

“What your hyung said. You will never win with this two love birds,” adds Jinyoung.

Youngjae just nods while munching on the stolen fry.

Jackson leans in and gives Mark a chaste kiss on the lips.

 

Oh, did I tell you? Both Mark and Jackson has been dating since they were 16. So they were each others first in every single little thing. Like the first kiss, the first hand holding, first date, first wet dream, first masturbation, first time having sex etcetera. You get the drill. It was like a natural progression for the both of them. Both their parents weren’t that surprised when they came out to them and told them about the nature of their relationship. On the other hand, it seems like they had always known and was close to marrying them off at that young age. Thankfully, Mark and Jackson was the level headed ones at that point but it was such a relief for the both of them that not only their coming out was accepted but their relationship as well. They must have done something good in their past life to have great parents like theirs. Their relationship wasn’t always that smooth sailing. There were bumps on that yellow brick road but they were able to work things out all the time or at least most of the time.

 

Their friends namely Jaebum, Jinyoung, Youngjae, Bam Bam and Yugyeom had to play referee more than once when those two fight. When they fight, they play dirty. Every single pass mistakes will be dug up and thrown at each other. It was not a very nice sight. But when they make up, it was as if what was said and done was a thing of the past and they would be one or at least the most lovey dovey, stomach churning, vomit inducing couple with the most outrageous public display of affection you have ever seen on campus. Sometimes they feel like hitting them over the head with a baseball bat just to knock them out because they were giving them goosebumps in not a good kinda way.

 

 

After 4 years in university, the four of them, Mark, Jackson, Jaebum and Jinyoung finally graduated from university. Armed with their degrees, they were ready to face the world. Naturally, Mark and Jackson moved into a small two room apartment. They wanted to be independent, after a lot of convincing their parents. They were happy to have their own place and had finally finished decorating it when they both slumped onto the sofa together.

“Finally we are done!” Jackson says.

“Aren’t you glad you listen to me to finish up now so that we don’t have to do it another day,” as Mark turns to poke Jackson on the cheek.

Jackson pretends not to hear Mark and started whistling.

“Yah! Jia Jia you did not just ignore me!”

Jackson laughs when Mark puts him in a headlock. Of course, he could easily overpower Mark, who is now pinned underneath him on the sofa.

“No fair,” as Mark pouts.

Jackson smiles at him affectionately before leaning down to kiss him on the lips.

“All is fair in love and war baby.”

Mark pouts before biting Jackson on the lips which made Jackson chuckle into his mouth. The chaste kisses turned to lazy kisses which turned into a full makeout session. Before you know it, they were getting hot and heavy on the sofa. Both half naked, Mark’s bottom half and Jackson’s upper half albeit with his sweatpants slightly pushed down. Even though they were a sweaty hot mess, that didn’t stop them from having a go on their sofa. By the time they were both spent, they were cuddling on the sofa, discussing what to have for dinner. Life was bliss.

 

After getting the job of their dreams, the both of them dropped by at their parent’s house. Jackson at Mark’s and Mark at Jackson’s. It was quite normal for them to do that even though they were both at the same place at the same time.

“Hi mummy. I got a job,” as Mark walks into the Wang’s kitchen.

Sophia went over to pull Mark into her embrace, “Congratulations BB.”

After fussing with him for a bit, Mark helped her to prepare dinner while Jackson was talking to Mark’s parents.

“Papi, I got the job!”

“Good boy. Did you get your first pick?” as Raymond walks over to Jackson to give him a hug.

“Yups,” Jackson emphasizing on the P.

After talking for a while, Jackson walked over to his own place with Raymond and Dorine Tuan, only to see Mark having a conversation with Ricky Wang while Sophia cooks. Yes. this is an ordinary day for them. Dorine went over to help Sophia while Ricky and Raymond was off to the living room to have a discussion over sports while Mark and Jackson decided to spend some time in his old bedroom, just talking about the future and of course making out. They know that they wouldn’t have time for a quickie without being caught by their parents and they didn’t want to put them in the spot after being so supportive of them for so many years. Life was good.

 

 

It had been two years since they started staying together after graduation. University didn’t count as they were sharing with Jaebum and Jinyoung. Their jobs keep them busy enough. At first they were able to make time with each other but as the months go by, they were given more responsibility and both got busy. Sometimes temper flares but they always made sure they made up before going to bed. It became a some sort of tradition for them. Never go to bed angry. Of course by making up, it would mean make up sex for them and it was always a win-win situation for them. One night, they were arguing about something very petty that they don’t even remember.

“I said I’m sorry! I was so busy that I forgot that I had promise to meet you at our coffee shop!” Jackson pacing in the room.

“You are not the only person busy you know!” Mark standing with his arms crossed in front of him.

“I SAID I’M SORRY!” 

“DON’T YOU YELL AT ME!”

They both were silent for a while. Tensions was running high. They were both so stressed out with their work. They both finally found the job of their dreams but adapting to it was a whole different matter. They were both tired and they haven’t been spending time with each other like they normally do ever since they started work.

“Look JiaJia, I know you are tired but I asked you out the one night that I got some free time.”

“I know Yien but my boss called me in for a last minute discussion as I was leaving.” 

“You could have text me!”

“They didn’t give me any time to! As soon as I walk into the meeting room, they started the discussion.”

“You always do this to me!” 

“You are always so infuriating!”

“Likewise!” 

“You know what, I think we just need to cool down. I’m going out.”

“I’m not done talking to you!”

Jackson ignores Mark and took his coat and walks out of their shared apartment. Deep down, Mark knew that this was better but he was still so angry at Jackson. He had even forgotten about their anniversary, 3rd July, the day they met, which was tonight.

 

A few minutes later, Mark heard a knock on the door. He felt himself smiling cause he thought it was Jackson coming home to surprise him or at least apologise to him for being such an ass and walking out on him angry. He got a shocked of his life when he felt somebody pushing him into their apartment, with ski masks on. He tried to fight back but the other person was stronger than he is. He tried calling out for Jackson over and over again. That seem to agitate the intruder. The last thing he remembered was being knock in the head with something heavy. Jackson came home about 10 minutes after the intruder has left, bringing with him their favourite drinks and treat from their favourite shop, the place where they are suppose to meet up a few hours ago. He felt like an idiot and wanted to make it up to Mark so he ran all the way there. He was sure that it would work. When he reached their apartment, he got shocked to see that the front door was opened. It wasn’t like Mark to leave without closing the door and he was sure he closed the door. He slammed it. Fear coursed through his veins.

“Baby! Yien!” 

The apartment was messy. It looked like somebody had ransacked through it. Jackson didn’t care for that. He looked for Mark and felt his blood turned to ice seeing him lying in his own pool of blood. 

“Mark! Baby?” as he pulls out his phone to call the ambulance.

 

 

By the time his parents and Mark’s arrived at the hospital, Jackson was already surrounded by his best friends.

“Jacks, where is Mark?” Raymond ask as he got closer.

“He is in there papi. I’m so sorry. I’m so so sorry,” as Jackson breaks down while hugging Raymond.

Raymond could only hold him and try to calm him down. Even though it was his son in there but for Jackson to walk in to find him like that must have been terrifying. Everybody was there waiting outside the operating theatre. Not one of them leave including Jaebum, Jinyoung, Youngjae, Bam Bam and Yugyeom. They took turns to get everybody coffee. They dropped everything just to be there for Jackson.

“Jacks, he’ll be fine,” says Jinyoung as he got closer to his friend.

“What if… Oh my god… I shouldn’t have left like that…”

Jackson went on to tell him about their stupid fight.

“I was tired and I really didn’t mean to forget. My boss called me… Oh god. What if that was my last conversation with him. Oh my god Jinyoungie.”

Jinyoung pulled him close.

“Shhh… Have faith. Mark will pull through. He he one tough cookie. After all he spent so long putting up with you,” JInyoung teasing Jackson hoping that it would make him feel better.

Jackson chuckled but there was still tears in his eyes. He wouldn’t be able to forgive himself if Mark doesn’t pull through. He shudders at that thought.  _ Oh God please let him pull through. I love him so much. _

 

A few hours later, the surgeon walks out of the operating theatre. The Tuan’s, the Wang’s, Jackson and the rest of the gang approached him. All of them were afraid what the doctor would say.

“Dr, how is my son?”

“Well, Mr Tuan, the operation is a success.”

“When can we see him?” Jackson interrupts.

“Better to come in tomorrow morning,” the surgeon advised.

All of the breath a sigh of relief. Jackson excused himself as he still needs to go down to the police station regarding his house. Jaebum and Jinyoung accompanied him as they didn’t want him to be alone during this time. After going back to the apartment to double check on everything, Jackson and Mark’s Macbooks, iPads, Mark’s iPhone and some cash in his wallet was stolen. Everything else was left alone. Jackson was grateful for both Jaebum and Jinyoung for being there for him even though they have work the next day.

“Thanks guys. I really appreciate it,” says Jackson as he tries to straighten up the mess that was made.

Jaebum punches his arm lightly and Jinyoung frowned at him.

“Hey, we are here for you okay,” says Jaebum.

“Yes so don’t have to thank us and all that crap okay. This is what friends do. We help,” Jinyoung adds.

With that said, Jackson broke down and cry which shock both of them. They quickly wrap their arms around him. Jackson must have been holding it in at the hospital, not wanting to show any weakness to their parents.

“Shhh… It’s okay Jacks. Mark is fine. Don’t worry. He is fine. It’s not your fault,” Jinyoung whispered.

Jackson nods but he couldn’t stop the tears. That night, Jaebum and Jinyoung stayed with Jackson at his place just to keep him company.

 

 

The next day, Jackson was feeling very high spirited and went over to the hospital during visiting hours. He was the last one there as he had to drop by the police station to sign his statements and to confirm everything. Mark was finally awake after being asleep for the last few days after the operation. Jackson knew that he wanted to see Mark as soon as possible. He missed the elder and he wanted to apologise to him. He knock on the door when he heard voices talking. After greeting everybody, he turned to look at Mark, all bandaged and bruised but still beautiful in his eyes.

“Hi handsome. How are you feeling?” as Jackson sat on the bed, taking Mark’s hand in his.

“Hi yourself. I think I’m okay.”

Jackson grinned. He felt relief. Before he could say anything he heard words that he never thought he would hear come out from Mark’s mouth.

“Who are you?”

Jackson felt his world crumbling down.

 

“Come on baby. It’s me.”

Jackson looks around at their parents and their friends. He gave him a nervous laugh. All of them was equally confused. Mark looks at Jackson before turning to look at his parents.

“Papi? Mami? Who is this?”

Dorine went over to Mark, holding his hand, “Yien, don’t you know who is everybody here?”

“I know you mami and papi.”

He then turns to point at Jackson’s parents, “That is mummy and daddy.”

“And over there is Jaebum, Jinyoung, Bam Bam, Youngjae and Yugyeom.”

Sophia Wang walks over to them and laid his hands on Jackson’s shoulder, “BB, how about Jackson?”

“Who is Jackson mummy? Do I know him?”

Mark was getting agitated. He wasn’t sure why everybody was looking at him weirdly, especially this guys name Jackson that he is suppose to know. Mark’s heartbeat begin to rise. His blood pressure begin to rise. The machines starting making a lot of noise. That seems to alarm everybody until Yugyeom went out to call the nurses and doctor. The nurses asked them to step out of the room while they examine Mark. Jackson was in disbelief. What does it all mean? Why is he the only one that Mark didn’t recognise. He was the closest one to him, is his lover. Ricky wrapped his arm around Jackson’s shoulder. It wasn’t the easiest thing for a father to witness but he knew his son was crushed.

 

Jackson crowded the doctor as soon as he came out of the room.

“Why doesn’t he recognise me? Why does he recognise everybody else but me? Why doctor why?”

The doctor raise both his hand and place it on Jackson’s shoulder, “Calm down.”

Jackson took a deep breath.

“Dr, what  is happening?”

“We are not sure. It is most probably related with his brain injury.”

“Then why am I the only one?”

“I’m not sure why. It is very hard to say in brain injuries. I would say give him time. Maybe in time he would remember…” was all the doctor said.

“Can we go see him?” Youngjae ask.

“We’ve sedated him. I think it’s best you let the patient rest today and maybe come back and see him tomorrow.”

They all nod. Before they left, Jackson went to see Mark one more time. He kissed him on his head before leaving.

 

 

The next day, Jackson went to see Mark after work. Mark was alone and he seems so at peace sleeping. Jackson walks over and caresses his face, carefully not to startle the elder. He trace the scars on his face, gently stroking the bruises. The guilt was evident on his face. He took a deep breath and decided to put the flowers that he brought in a vase before going out to wash an apple so that he can peel it for Mark. Mark woke up to a nice bouquet of gerberas. It was colourful and it made him happy. He wondered who would be so thoughtful to bring him flowers. His question was answered when Jackson walked in. He was still surprised, wondering why did a guy he barely knew would do this.

“Hi?”

“Hi Mark. Want some apple?”

Mark nods and points at the flowers, “Did you bring me that?”

Jackson nods as he starts peeling the apple next to Mark.

“Who did you say you were again?”

Jackson felt his heart break a little but he keep a brave front. It was going to be a long road ahead as per the doctor but he was determined to go to the end with Mark. After all he has been the one beside him all these years. He wasn’t going to let anything change that.

“I’m Jackson.”

“Hi Jackson. I’m Mark.”

Jackson smiled as he passes a piece of apple to him.

“I know. I know everything about you.”

Mark kept quiet. He was kind of fidgeting and was getting a bit uncomfortable. It feels weird that somebody he doesn’t know, knows everything about him. He wasn’t liking it. Jackson who can always read Mark like a book kept quiet.

“I think papi and mami can explain that to you. But, you don’t have to be afraid of me okay. Just know that I’m a friend.”

Mark nods nervously. As afraid as he was at that moment, he was also feeling a bit calmed. He didn’t know how to explain it. But something about what Jackson said resonates with him.

 

A week later, Mark was finally discharge from the hospital and they decided that he should move back to his parents place as he has to go for physiotherapy and the parents place was closer to the place. Jackson didn’t object as he knows that it was best that Mark goes home. He also didn’t want him to be triggered should he goes back to their shared apartment. At the moment, it would seem like Mark didn’t really believe him just yet but Jackson was willing to wait. Jackson didn’t rush Mark at all. He would even take time off to accompany Mark to therapy.

“Hey Jacks, are you sure your boss isn’t angry at you for taking so much time off?” Mark ask.

“No. They are okay with it. I work overtime to make it up to them.”

“Thanks Jackson.”

“Anytime Mark.”

They would talk about random things as Jackson didn’t want to rush him at all. He’ll wait the next check up. Until then, he would be a friend to Mark. He would still go over to Mark’s place from time to time with the gang. Usually Mark would look like he had more fun with them than with him and those are the nights that he goes home and actually cries himself to sleep.

“I can’t give up. There is still hope. I know it.”

That is what Jackson would tell himself from time to time. He was not going to give up just because of this little hurdle. They were going to get through this.

 

 

The day before his check up, his father came and check up on him in the room.

“Hey Yien.”

“Hi papi. What’s up?” as he made himself comfortable on his bed.

“How is therapy going?”

“It’s fine. I am able to move better.”

“How’s your memory?”

“I guess it’s okay except that I still don’t remember Jackson. Other than that, it’s okay.”

Raymond felt sad for Jackson. Nevertheless, he was happy that Mark is happy and fine.

“Do you want to know more about him?”

Mark shakes his head, “I want to see if I can remember things papi. I know it’s unfair but I don’t want to reply on anybody’s words.”

Raymond smiled and kissed him on the head.

“Okay Yien. Tomorrow we’ll be there with you.”

“Papi, will Jackson be there?”

“Most probably. Why?”

“Nothing. Just asking. Good night.”

“Good night.”

Raymond turns off the light for Mark but sleep wouldn’t come to him. Mark wonders why is Jackson the only one he couldn’t remember. Also, why is Jackson treating him so nice even though he doesn’t remember him at all. But, it wasn’t a bad feeling. Jackson gives him a very comfortable feeling. It’s like he knows him but just that he can’t remember him. Mark groans into his pillow. He needed to be well rested. Tomorrow he will be seeing the surgeon to find out what’s wrong with his memories.

 

The next day, Jackson waited for them at the hospital. He was nervous. This was it. Maybe they can find out what’s wrong with Mark’s memory. Mark smiled when he saw Jackson waiting at the hospital.

“Hi.”

“Hi Mark. How are you feeling today?”

“Great!”

“Great enough to remember me?”

That made Mark frown which Jackson was quick to pull out a packet of strawberries for him. Mark smiled when he saw the fruit, giving Jackson his vampire grin. Jackson pats him on the head which made the elder smile.

“For me?”

“Obviously,” Jackson pretending to roll his eyes. 

“Thank you,” Mark whispers.

 

After hugging Mark’s parents, they all walk in together. The doctor was already waiting for them.

“Hello Mark. How are you feeling? How is therapy?”

“Hi Dr. I’m fine. Therapy is going great. They say they can discharge me soon from rehab.”

“That’s good to hear. Now let’s give you a check up.”

The doctor did the normal check and went through the scans that he had to do a few days prior. Jackson was feeling nervous. He was clenching and unclenching his hands, pacing behind them.

“You scans looks good. All seems normal. I think you are good to go, Mark.”

Everybody was happy except Jackson. He seems scared. If all was good, why can’t Mark remember him. Mark’s voice was what brought him back to reality.

“Dr, if all is good, why can’t I seem to remember Jackson?”

“I can’t answer you that. The brain is a mysterious organ and for some reason this unfortunate thing happened. I would say, give it some time.”

“Will Mark ever regain the memories that he had forgotten?” Jackson interrupts.

This was the tricky part. The doctor knew he can’t give them a definite answer.

“I can’t guarantee that. He might remember them. He might not. He might remember them in the future or not at all. I’m sorry.”

Jackson was crestfallen. Mark felt sad for him but he was happy that he was given a clean bill of health. 

 

After leaving the hospital, Mark ask Jackson to send him back home as he wants to talk to him.

“I’m sorry I can’t remember you Jacks.”

“It’s okay. I guess. But I’ll be here anyway,” Jackson giving him a sad smile.

Mark didn’t like seeing Jackson sad for some reason. But he knew what happened can’t be help.

“How about you slowly show me places that we’ve been? Maybe it might trigger some memory?”

Jackson felt hopeful.

“You can tell me about us one thing at a time too Jacks.”

“Jia Jia.”

“Huh?”

“You called me Jia Jia and I called you En En.”

“Jia Jia,” Mark repeated after him.

Jackson smiled and Mark mirrored him.

“It’s a start. A little bit at a time then, Jia Jia.”

Jackson nods. He then changes the subject and talks to Mark about random things that happened at work. They were talking until they reached Mark’s house. Jackson then reaches over and gave Mark’s hand a squeeze before he got out of the car.

“I’m here and I’ll always be here right next to you, even though you don’t remember a thing.”

“Thank you. Jia Jia.”

Jackson was hopeful. Mark was slowly opening up to the idea of knowing about him. It was a start. A painful start but it was a start.

 

 

But because Mark was away from his work for so long, he was laid off from it. At first he was sad about it but then he decided that it was for the best. He decided that he wanted to help out at the rehab centre for the time being while looking for what he wants to do. Being in the corporate world didn’t really appeal to him anymore. Maybe something good came out from this accident. At the same time, he was hanging out alot with the old gang. Jaebum, Jinyoung, Youngjae, Bam Bam and Yugyeom and of course Jackson. They were always in a group but it was nice. One night, he decided to ask them about Jackson before he arrived.

“Guys, what is Jackson to me?”

All of them look at each other before staring at Mark again.

“Mark, do you not remember anything at all about Jackson?” Jinyoung ask.

Mark shakes his head, “Am I supposed to?”

“He is practically the love of your life hyung!” Bam Bam burst out which had the others shushing him.

Mark blushes.

“Hasn’t he told you any of this yet?” Jaebum ask.

Mark shakes his head again, “He’s been busy lately so we haven’t been able to have a proper conversation.”

“Doesn’t Jackson hyung text you?” Youngjae probes.

Mark’s face lights up, “He does. Every single day without fail.”

“Don’t you feel something about him hyung?” Yugyeom ask.

 

Mark ponders for a while. He wasn’t sure what he was suppose to feel but it was very comfortable being around Jackson. He can’t explain it but after spending some time with him, he feels at ease with Jackson. Whenever Jackson isn’t around, something feels like it is missing but he didn’t want to think too much into it either. He needed to figure it out first before saying it out loud. Mark’s thoughts was broken when he heard Jackson’s voice. He looks up and waves at Jackson.

“Hi Jacks.”

For some reason, he wanted to keep that name a secret from the others. Maybe the others already know but it felt sacred on his lips and he wanted only Jackson to hear it.

“Hi Mark. Hi everybody.”

“Have you guys ordered yet?” Jackson ask.

“No hyung. We were waiting for you,”Bam Bam answered.

“Bams, how could you let Mark starve. I mean it’s okay for you but he is a patient.”

“Yah… Mark hyung said he wanted to wait for you,” says Bam Bam as he sulks.

Mark hyung touches his hand, “I did say that.”

“I’m sorry Bams. Now let’s order.”

Jackson then turns to Mark, “What do you wanna eat?”

“What’s good here?”

“Shall I order your usual?”

“I have a usual?” Mark looking surprised.

Jackson nods.

“We always come here at least once a month hyung,” says Jinyoung.

“Okay,” says Mark.

After ordering, they all lapse into a comfortable conversation, talking about their university days. Mark seems to be having fun, laughing along but he couldn’t remember a lot of things but it was nice to know. Jackson couldn’t help but feel his heart ache knowing that Mark couldn’t remember some things as he played a big part in them.

 

Jackson was the one to send Mark home after hanging out with the rest of them. In the car they just keep quiet. No conversations between them but it felt nice. It was comfortable. It was as if they didn’t need any words to fill in the gaps.

“Jia Jia.”

Jackson hums and looks at Mark.

“Nothing. I thought I just call your name,” as Mark grins.

Jackson smiles and reaches over to ruffle his hair.

“Did you have fun En En?”

Mark nods.

“Can I ask you something Jia Jia?”

“Sure.” 

“Is it true that we are dating?”

Jackson took a deep breath. He might as well just tell him since the others already did. He wanted to ease into it. He didn’t want Mark to get the wrong idea. 

“Yes. We’ve been dating since we were 16.”

“Oh. It’s been…” Mark was trying to count his age.

“We’ve been dating for the last 10 years.”

“Wow.”

Jackson chuckled. He thought so too himself. It was wow. But they’ve known each other much longer than that. Mark was silent again. They were both silent until they reached Mark’s place. Before he got out of the car, Mark turn to look at Jackson.

“Do you… Could you…”

“Yes En En?”

“Do you think you can bring me to the places that we’ve been before?”

“S-s-sure. If-if you want to.”

“I do.”

“Don’t be pressured though.”

“Okay,” as Mark yawns.

Jackson chuckles, “Go get some rest. I’ll talk to you soon.”

“Okay. Bye Jia Jia.”

Before Mark went down, he quickly gave Jackson a quick kiss on the cheek before running off. That caught Jackson by surprised but it left a smile on his face. He punches up in the air.

“I’m back in the game.”

 

 

From that day on, Jackson would bring Mark to the places that they used to go to from time to time. He didn’t want to pressure him and he knew Mark wanted to spend time with their mutual friends as well. It might be slow progress but Jackson sometimes feel it was progress. There were good days and bad days, there is no denying that. The good days, Mark would be patiently listening to Jackson and asking him questions. Bad days, Mark sulks or throws a tantrum for not being able to recall anything. It was frustrating for him and also Jackson but Jackson knew he has to be patient.

“I don’t want to be here anymore. Take me home Jacks.”

“We just got here. You said you wanted to come to this place.”

“I know what I said.”

For some reason, Mark was extremely hard on himself that day. He was having a bad day. He couldn’t remember where he had left his notebook which he was sure was in the house. He also seem to had forgotten to bring over something to one of his friends at the rehab centre. So having no recollection about this shared place with Jackson frustrates him even more. He was wiping frustrated tears from his face. Jackson felt himself softening to the elder a bit even though he was tired from a long week but since Mark wanted to go somewhere, Jackson decided to suck it up and go, only to have Mark being frustrated at himself.

“Baby? En En?” as Jackson brushes his tears away from Mark’s eyes.

Mark looks at Jackson.

“What’s wrong?”

“I’m tired of all this. Why can’t I remember some things?” as Mark started crying.

Jackson pulled him close.

“You’ll get there. Now it’s like you are laying everything in the box on the floor. And you are slowly picking up everything to put it back in the box.”

“Why can’t it happen sooner? I can’t even remember you. Where are you in the box?” Mark sulking.

Jackson feels his heart break but some things is just unexplainable. He kept quiet. Mark knew he had cross the line just a little.

“I’m sorry Jia Jia. I didn’t mean to let my frustration at you.”

“It’s okay. You can try another time.”

“I’m just so tired. I can’t remember anything about us. My head hurts. Why can’t I just move on?” Mark saying his thoughts out loud, not knowing that it was hurting Jackson.

“You can En En. I’ll always be here even though you don’t remember us.”

“I don’t mean it that way but… it’s just so frustrating knowing that you had forgotten something but there is nothing you can do to get that memory back.”

Jackson takes a deep breath. It wasn’t fair for Mark or for him but he knows maybe this was for the best. He would rather suck in his pain then to have Mark being sad and frustrated.

“Let’s just work on the now then. Let’s not try to revisit your past. But if you ever want to, I will take you there.”

“Thank you Jia Jia. Thanks for being so understanding.”

Jackson gave him a sad smile. That night, Jackson went home and cried himself to sleep. He just didn’t know what to do anymore.

 

 

Ever since then, Jackson never bring Mark back to the places they had gone before. Mark seems happier. He was finally discharge from therapy but decided to go back to the rehab centre to help out from time to time. Jackson was getting busier and busier at work so he would only see Mark when he has free time. That particular day, Jackson was having a bad day at work but Mark called him up and ask him to bring him to one of their favourite date spots. Jackson didn’t want to disappoint him did just that. Mark was feeling the ambience. He really like the place which has a look out point and he was talking about how nice the place was.

“Do you remember this place Mark?”

Mark shakes his head. 

“How about you try?”

“I can’t.”

“I just said try Mark.”

“I can’t Jacks. Don’t push me.”

“Maybe you just don’t want to.”

“You know what. Maybe you are right. I’m tired of trying. Maybe I just don’t want to anymore.”

Mark knew that he shouldn't have said it as soon as he said it. Jackson looked like Mark had slapped him right across the face. But Mark was also angry at Jackson. First he said he wouldn’t force him which was why Mark thought he tried again but to have Jackson accusing him of not willing to try, that hurts. Mark looks down to his hands. He was clenching them so hard that it left indents in them. Jackson knowing that he had also crossed the line stood up and walks over to Mark, unclenching his hands, rubbing the indents.

“I’m sorry En En. I had a bad day at work. I shouldn't have let it out on you.”

“I’m sorry too Jia Jia but I am really trying here.”

Jackson shakes his head and leans in to kiss Mark on the forehead.

“I know you are. That is enough.”

“You’ll still be here right? Even though I don’t remember.”

Fate was a cruel thing. To hear that from Mark, that was unfair.

“Always.”

 

 

The both of them never brought it up again nor did they discuss further about it. Day by day, Mark decided to look ahead. No turning back. He was going to make new memories. He wasn’t going to force anything anymore. He had even gotten Jackson’s blessings to do so. Jackson on the other hand feels like he is withering day by day.  He could feel himself losing his grasp on Mark as the days go by. It was the total opposite for the both of them. Mark was opening up and looks happy while Jackson finds himself burying himself with work. He didn’t want to be reminded that the love of his life, the boy that he has been in love with since he was 6 had forgotten about him. He thought he could remember for the both of them. He thought he could be strong enough for the both of them but god knows how hard he tries. Jaebum, Jinyoung, Youngjae, Bam Bam and Yugyeom was the only ones that knew how hard he was trying including his parents and Mark’s parents. He could only express his frustration at them or even cry. But even though it was hard, Jackson was still trying to hold on but he wasn’t sure if he could hold on anymore as it had almost been a year since the incident happened to Mark. The police never caught the culprits. Jackson had to accept the fact that what happened to Mark was a stroke of bad luck. Regardless how he was feeling, Jackson tries his best to keep his spirits up but when you see the one you love slipping away, he knew that it was a matter of time till he has to let go.

 

Mark on the other hand felt like a big weight has been lifted from his shoulders. He didn’t have to force himself to remember Jackson. Jackson was letting him do that on his own which he was grateful for. Mark likes having Jackson around. There was something familiar about it. Mark also likes the fact that Jackson didn’t try to make him remember about them anymore. It felt forced. But when Jackson says he would still be there for him even though he couldn’t remember him, Mark felt assured. Mark trusted his words. He felt that he could finally recover. Slowly but surely, Mark was sure that he might be able to remember Jackson. But even if he doesn’t, Mark was sure he could remember the feelings. Slowly he could feel the feelings manifesting but Mark didn’t want to rush it. He wanted to be sure. He wanted it to be from himself and he didn’t want anybody influencing it. Whatever it was, Mark knew he was feeling something in his heart. His heart and mind feels at ease for the first time in many months. It felt free. Free to do choose or do whatever he wants. He could feel himself feeling happier.

 

 

It was open mic night at the cafe that they usually hang out in and they were all sitting there talking and just having a good time with drinks. For some reason, their batch in high school decides to have a reunion that night. Mark looks like he was having a good time talking to those he knows or doesn’t know as he was still trying to remember some things. Slowly putting back all the puzzle pieces so to speak. But for some reason, those memories seems easier to be picked up and not those with Jackson’s. Mark finds it confusing. Jackson finds it heartbreaking. Was it so bad to the point that Mark couldn’t even recall a single thing about him even though they had been together since forever? But he did read somewhere that brain injuries can be weird. Sometimes they could only remember certain things or times or people. Maybe this is what is happened to Mark. For some reason, he had only forgotten Jackson, the one person who knows him the best. Either it is a defense mechanism or something else, Jackson would never know.

 

When it seems like nobody is looking or noticing, Jackson decided to sing a song. Not for anybody else but he has been mulling over it for a long time and also that job offer that he had received. But tonight, he could see that Mark is happy. He didn‘t need to worry about him anymore but he would be lying if that doesn’t break his heart a little more. Knowing that you are not the reason that, that person is smiling and laughing. Knowing that, that person is happy without you. Knowing that, that person will never understand how you are feeling deep down inside. Maybe this song sums up whatever he is feeling at that moment. Maybe this is it. He has done all he can. He had given it everything. Jackson takes a deep breath and starts singing

 

_...Turn down the lights _

_ Turn down the bed _

_ Turn down these voices inside my head _

_ Lay down with me _

_ Tell me no lies _

_ Just hold me close _

_ Don't patronize _

_ Don't patronize me _

 

_ 'Cause I can't make you love me if you don't _

_ You can't make your heart feel something it won't _

_ Here in the dark in these final hours _

_ I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power _

_ But you won't, no you won't _

_ 'Cause I can't make you love me if you don't _

 

Jackson could see Mark mingling around, not noticing that he is singing. He was glad in a way but how his heart ache at that very moment. To see the one you love looking so happy, so carefree and you are not the reason for that smile on his face. To see the one you love laughing and knowing that you are not the reason for that laughter. It’s as if everything boils down to he is no longer the reason that makes Mark happy.

 

_ I'll close my eyes _

_ Then I won't see _

_ The love you don't feel when you're holding me _

_ Morning will come _

_ And I'll do what's right _

_ Just give me 'til then to give up this fight _

_ And I will give up this fight _

 

_ 'Cause I can't make you love me if you don't _

_ You can't make your heart feel something it won't _

_ Here in the dark in these final hours _

_ I will lay down my heart and I'll feel the power _

_ But you won't, no you won't _

_ 'Cause I can't make you love me if you don't... _

 

Only when people started clapping did Mark realize that Jackson was on stage. Mark went over to Jackson and saw that his eyes was brimming with tears.

“Hey, you okay? I missed your performance.”

Jackson chuckles, “You wanted to hear a puppy howling?”

“Wouldn’t mind,” Mark teases.

Jackson pinches Mark which made the elder pouts. Jackson chuckles and ruffles his hair.

“Hey Jacks, a bunch of us, including my parents are going over to the beach tomorrow. We can go boating or something. What do you say?”

“Sure.”

“See you there tomorrow?”

“Okay.”

Before Jackson could say anything more, Mark was being pulled away from another group of friends to mingle and talk. Jackson could only see that Mark was slowly slipping away from his grasp.

 

 

The next morning, Jackson wakes up with a heavy heart to head to the beach. Jinyoung told him that everybody was already there. Jackson only told him that he is on the way. Since Mark suggested boating, he decided to rent a boat and make his way there. When he got closer, he could see them on the beach and some on the jetty. Mark was one of them on the jetty with Jaebum, Jinyoung, Bam Bam, Youngjae and Yugyeom. Jackson stares at Mark from the boat. He could see how happy Mark was without him. No stress of trying to remember things. Just enjoying everything as it is.  As much as it broke his heart, Jackson feels that this is the best. This is the best for Mark. This is it. This is when he tells himself to walk away. This is when he gives up this fight. As the boat passes Mark, It caught the eye of Mark. Mark notice that Jackson was on it.

“Jackson?”

Mark starts running after the boat by the jetty, looking at Jackson. Jackson gave him a sad smile and wave. Mark didn’t understand why Jackson looks so sad. He couldn’t hear what he was saying.

“What did you say? Where are you going? Jackson?” Mark shouts.

Jackson blows him a kiss and just sat there as the boat moves further away from the jetty.

“I love you Mark. I’ve loved you all my life and my heart doesn’t know how not to anymore,” Jackson whispers.

Jackson then turns around to look ahead. It’s time to look towards the future and not the past. Jackson would be lying if it didn’t hurt like a mother fucker. Walking away from the love of his life was the hardest thing he ever had to do and the most painful. 

 

Jackson walks into his mother’s loving arms as soon as he got home. He just cried and cried and cried while his mother stroking his back, holding him like a child again.

“It’s okay Gaga. Shhh… You’ll be okay baby.”

“Will I ever be happy again mummy?”

Sophia Wang cups his face and looks at him in the eye, “Yes baby. You will and I can promise you that.”

Jackson buries his face in the crook of her neck. He felt relief when he heard those words. It might not sound true if it was anybody who said it, but if it’s his mother who said it, he would believe in it wholeheartedly. Just hearing his mother’s reassuring words, Jackson felt much better already. 

 

 

A few years later, Mark now volunteers at rehabilitation centre. He decided he wanted to help other people just like how they helped him. He felt like it wasn’t much but he gets to give back to society while interacting with other people. There were kids and adults alike. So depending which part needs more help, he would help that section. It was fun. Today especially was gonna be a fun day as there would be a company coming over to do their Corporate Social Responsibility. They prepared a lot of fun games for the kids and activities for the adults. Even Mark was having fun. His family including Jaebum, Jinyoung, Youngjae, Bam Bam and Yugyeom came over to help. 

 

The place was decorated with balloons and streamers which hype everybody up including the older patients. It was nice of that company to do that. All Mark heard was that this was a PR company manned by a young CEO. They have clients from all over including the states and China. So, word has it that the young CEO wanted to give back to the people in Seoul. Whatever or however that company was doing, it must have been very good cause they were quite lavish with what they are spending at the moment. Mark and the gang was playing with the kids at the moment. He was glad that they were there with him though they were missing one more person. Mark couldn’t help but think about Jackson at the moment. It made his heart ache just a little.

 

_ Ever since he saw Jackson on that boat, he had never seen or spoke to him again. Mark did go over to the Wang’s place after his outing at the beach.  _

_ “Hi mummy,” Mark greeting Sophia Wang. _

_ “Hi BB,” pulling him into a hug. _

_ “Is Jackson here? He was suppose to meet me at the beach. I thought I saw him on a boat but I might be wrong. So I was wondering if…” _

_ “Oh BB, Jackson left just a little while ago.” _

_ Sophia was surprised. She thought that Jackson rented a boat to see Mark and would have spoken to him. Now it was clear why her son looked so heartbroken when he walked in that door. _

_ “Oh. When is he coming back mummy?” _

_ “I _ don’t know BB _.” _

_ That hit him. Jackson was out of his life. Mark slumped onto the ground which shocked Sophia and had her calling for Ricky to help him. _

_ “Dear! Dear! Come here! Help me!” _

_ Ricky Wang ran over and helped pull Mark up. Sophia cupped his face and checked him all over. _

_ “BB, are you okay? Are you hurt? Does your head hurt? Talk to me BB.” _

_ Mark shakes his head vigorously. He didn’t even know why he started crying. _

_ “Where did he go? He said he would never leave me? Was that just a lie? Was it because I cannot remember him? Why mummy why?” _

_ Sophia held him tight and kissed him on the head. She wonders if it was too late for the both of them. It seems like even though Mark had forgotten about Jackson but for some reason he is still drawn to her son. That makes it even more sad cause she knows that Jackson loves Mark with his entire being and being close to Mark, who had forgotten him was the most painful thing he had to go through. As much as she didn’t want that happening to her son, she couldn’t help but wished that he was here right this moment cause the look on Mark’s face just crushed her. _

_ “Mummy, Jackson lied to me. He lied to me. Mummy, daddy,” as he sobs in her arms. _

_ Sophia and Ricky felt their heart breaking for the both of them. All they could do was comfort Mark. She wonders why the universe would be so cruel to these two young lovers. Why were they testing their love to such extent. _

_ “Oh BB…” Sophia was lost for words.  _

_ How do you tell somebody who is like a son to you that her own flesh and blood had to go away because he love them too much? _

_ “Shhh…” as Sophia continues stroking his hair, trying to calm Mark down.  _

_ She knew that this was Jackson’s decision and she has to respect it. Mark cried til he was tired so he asked Sophia if he could rest in Jackson’s room. Sophia looked skeptical but she couldn’t deny him of his little request. _

 

_ Mark walked into Jackson’s room and laid down on his bed. Everything smelled like him. He notice there was loads of pictures of them every since they were young. He wondered why couldn’t he remember anything about Jackson when clearly they had known each other for so long.  His heart ached thinking that maybe it was because of him that Jackson left. Maybe everything was just getting to overwhelming for Jackson that he had to just picked up and leave. _

_ “Where are you?” Mark whispers as he cries himself to sleep on Jackson’s bed. _

_ Mark doesn’t know why he was feeling so clingy and attached to Jackson at the moment. During the time he was recovering, he had a very good feeling towards Jackson though he could not remember anything about him. He felt bad when Jackson brought them to all their favourite places and everything, and yet, he couldn’t even recall a single thing. Jackson tried his best and never seemed to give up on him even when he grew frustrated to the point that he told Jackson he doesn’t want to try anymore. Did that made him snap? Did that made him give up on him? Mark wished he never said those things but it might be something he would just regret for the rest of his life. _

 

 

Mark’s thought were interrupted when he saw the Wang’s.

“Mummy, daddy!” throwing himself at them.

“How are you BB?” Sophia cupping his face.

“I’m fine mummy. Don’t you miss me anymore? Don’t you love me anymore? You haven’t been home like forever mummy, daddy,” Mark whines and pouts.

Ricky and Sophia laughs. Ever since Jackson left, Mark has been visiting them very often to learn more about the younger and how they were. He wished he had done it sooner. Regardless if he could remember or not, it was nice to spend time with them. After all, they are still close family friends of his parents.

“Sorry BB. We went back to Hong Kong for a while to visit relatives there,” Ricky ruffling Mark’s hair. 

Mark continues sulking until his parents walks over to them.

“Papi, mami, look! Mummy and daddy is here.”

“We can see that Yien,” Raymond giving Sophia and Ricky a hug.

“Fine. I got to go. I think I’m needed over there. See you guys later,” giving them all a kiss on the cheek before running off to where the patients are gathering. 

“So how is our boy Jackson?” Dorine giving Sophia a hug.

“You’ll see,” Sophia smiling conspiringly with her.

“Let’s hope they can work things out,” Ricky chimes in.

“Let’s just cross our fingers and hoped for the best,” Raymond adds.

They started talking about the Wang’s trip back home.

 

“Yah, Mark hyung, where did you go?” Bam Bam grumbling at the elder.

“Sorry! I saw mummy and daddy Wang so I went over to talk to them.”

The five of them had a shocked look on their face.

“What? Can’t I talk to them?”                                                                             

“Hyung, did you remember something?” Yugyeom approaching the subject carefully.

Mark shakes his head, “They are my parent’s close friends. And I’ve known them since forever even though I had forgotten their only son.”

Jaebum squeeze his shoulder. Mark pats his hand and smile, “I’m okay guys. Now let’s get everybody ready for their performance.”

They nod and begin talking to the patients and making sure everybody could see the mini stage in front.

 

 

It wasn’t long till one of the employees of Papillion came up to the stage to emcee.

“Hello everyone!”

The crowd says hi back to him.

“How are we today?”

There was an array of answers from the crowd.

“So we have a special treat for you guys today. We would like to invite none other than our Boss Wang to sing us a song.”

That peaks everybody’s attention, especially Mark’s since there was only daddy and mummy and the moment who has the surname Wang. Could it be either one of them? He didn’t know that they could sing and he didn’t know that they had a company name Papillion. But when he saw the person who walked on stage, he felt his breath was taken away.

“Hi everybody. I’m Jackson or for some reason, they like to call me Boss Wang when we all know that Boss Wang are my parents,” Jackson says, prompting laughter from the crowd.

“I didn’t know that this would happen,” turning round to see his giggling employees.

Jackson then turns his attention back to the crowd. He didn’t notice his friends including Mark standing right at the back. Youngjae wrapped his arms around Mark’s waist.

“I can’t think of any song right now except this one. So, one of you giggling troublemakers please play the guitar.”

One of his employees went on stage and sat down with a guitar. Jackson cleared his throat.

 

_...Lying alone in my room _

_ Don't know what I'm gonna do _

_ Trying to figure out _

_ If this is it this time _

_ Just can't stop thinking _

_ About the way you make me feel inside _

_ I just can't get you off my mind _

_ No matter how hard I try _

 

_ Could you be the one for me _

_ Could we dance the night away _

_ I want to give you everything _

_ Though I don't have much _

_ Could you fall in love with me _

_ Could you love me the rest of my life _

_ Could you forever be _

_ The one for me, this time... _

 

Jackson couldn’t help but think about Mark at that very moment. It was his parents that suggested that his company did their CSR at this particular Rehabilitation Centre. For the last few years, he actually went to work at a renowned PR company based in Hong Kong. It was only recently that he was asked to open a branch in Seoul and since he stayed there for most of his life, they thought that he was the most suitable candidate to man the branch there. They offered him to be a partner and he took the opportunity to be back to the place where he called home for almost 20 years. It felt really nice to be home even though he just flew in the night before as he had to be in Hong Kong for an important meeting.

 

_...I walk around in a daze _

_ The ice is melting from my heart _

_ Can I ever know if you feel the same _

_ Are you the sunshine that's begging me _

_ Come in from the rain _

_ Or have you come into my life _

_ To turn around and take your love away _

 

_ Could you be the one for me _

_ Could we dance the night away _

_ I want to give you everything _

_ Though I don't have much _

_ Could you fall in love with me _

_ Could you love me the rest of my life _

_ Could you forever be _

_ The one for me, this time _

 

Just as he was singing the last notes of the song, he finally notice the familiar faces standing at the back. Jaebum’s signature smirk was so evident that Jackson almost chuckle mid song. Jinyoung with his eye crinkling smile. Yugyeom the tall baby that was waving at him like crazy. Bam Bam who was making weird faces at him at the moment. Youngjae with his sunny disposition and finally Mark. The one that he loved all his life. The one whom he held his hand since he was five. The one that he had all his first with including heartbreak. The one at this moment whom is biting his lips. He knew this habit well. It was either he was nervous or he was about to cry.

 

_ When I look into your eyes _

_ (Oh,Oh,Oh,Oh) _

_ They tell me that you're mine _

_ but I keep asking myself _

 

_ Could you forever be _

_ The one for me _

_ This time… _

 

As soon as Jackson finish singing, he quickly made his way to his best friends whom he had not seen for a while. He knew he would get his ass kicked but he just needed the change of environment. He needed the change to try to forget Mark.

 

 

“How could you not tell us?” Jaebum, Jinyoung, Youngjae, Bam Bam and Yugyeom crowding him and pulling him into a hug.

“I didn’t know okay. My parents were the ones who arranged it for me,” Jackson explains.

“When did you get in hyung?” Bam Bam putting his arm around his shoulder.

“Last night. I had a meeting in Hong Kong.”

“Are you back for good?” Jinyoung ask.

“Yeah. I’m a partner at this company and they asked me to open a branch here. So. I’m here to stay.”

They were chatting for awhile before realizing that Mark was still standing there looking at them. Jackson rub his neck and gave Mark an awkward smile. Before he could say anything, he could see Mark crying.

“You lied.”

Jackson look confused as ever, “Huh?”

“You lied. You said that you would never leave me.”

As soon as Mark said those words, he ran away. Jackson was left bewildered. He wasn’t sure what happened. He was just stunned. It took Jaebum kicking his ass, literally before he moved.

“Oi! Get your ass moving and go after him. Mark has been talking to your parents about your childhood ever since you left without a trace.”

Jackson was still stunned at the turn of events till Yugyeom and Bam Bam pushed him towards where Mark was running to.

“Hyung! What are you doing? Get your ass running!” says Bam Bam.

That seem to have awaken Jackson up. He picked up his feet and started running to where Mark was. He hoped that this was a good sign for him. He was breathing hard. He was still tired from his flight and he haven’t ran in a long time. Maybe not as fast as this but still it was hard work. He kept looking around trying to find Mark until he saw his parents. Before he could say anything, his parents was glaring at him.

“Gaga, what did you say to Mark? What did you do to our BB?” Ricky speaking up.

It was rare of his father to say this and it kind of shocked him a little until he was left speechless.

“He went that way boy. You better be quick,” Dorine pointing at where Mark ran.

“What are you waiting for? Go get him back!” Ricky pushing him.

“O-o-okay!” Jackson says as he started running again.

 

He could see Mark hiding behind the tree. If it weren’t for his blonde hair, Jackson would have missed him.

“En En!”

Mark turns to look at Jackson before moving towards the garden. Jackson sprinted towards him and pulled his arm.

“Stop running.”

Mark was glaring at him. He looked beyond pissed. Jackson wasn’t sure if he remembered anything or he was just pissed at Jackson for no reason.

“En En.”

Mark pulled his hand away and wipe his tears vigorously.

“Baby?” Jackson looking at the red eye beauty in front of him.

“Don’t you baby me, Mr.”

“Did you remember something.”

Mark shakes his head. Jackson’s shoulders slump in defeat. This was really it. His heart would break beyond repair now.

“Do I need to remember something to be angry?” Mark still glaring at Jackson.

Jackson looks at Mark, all confused.

“Then? Why are you mad at me for?” 

“You lied! You left me when you said you wouldn’t!”

Mark was crying again. He wasn’t sure why he was so hurt at Jackson’s actions. All he knew was that it hurts.

 

 

Jackson takes a deep breath before taking a step towards Mark. He cups his face and wipe the tears from his eyes with his thumbs.

“I’m sorry?”

“No you are not. You promise that you would be there for me even if I don’t remember anything but you left. And you left in the shittiest way possible. You left without saying goodbye,” Mark sniffles.

Jackson gave him a sad smile strokes his teary cheek with his thumbs.

“I’m sorry.”

Mark starts hitting his chest weakly. He was so angry at Jackson but he was also relief when he saw Jackson on stage and he couldn’t help the tears that ran down his face.

“I’m sorry baby. I’m so so sorry,” as Jackson pulls Mark into embrace and hugs him tight.

Mark hits his back some more before pulling him in and burying his face in his neck.

“Don’t you dare do this to me again Jacks.”

Jackson chuckles sadly. Fate is being cruel to him at the moment but who is he to deny Mark’s request.

“I promise I won’t,” as he strokes Mark’s hair.

“My heart hurts when you are not around,” Mark mumbling into his neck.

Jackson thought his heart stop. Did he just hear that from Mark?

“What did you say baby?”

Mark shakes his head and remained buried in his neck. Jackson pushes Mark away slightly before cupping his face.

“Yien?”

“I said my heart hurts when you are not around okay and I don’t know why.”

Mark shakes away Jackson’s hands before he buries himself into his neck again and held onto Jackson tight. Jackson started laughing. He couldn’t believe this. Regardless whether Mark remembers their relationship or not, it didn’t matter. What matter this moment was that Mark said those words to him. They just hugged each other for awhile until Mark’s breath calms down. He prays to all the universal beings that this would mean something.

 

After Mark calms down, he pulls himself away from Jackson to wipe his face. He was sure that he was all red and puffy.  Jackson was sure that he had never seen Mark more beautiful than this moment right now.

“Did you remember something about us?” Jackson ask Mark hopefully.

Mark shakes his head, “No. I don’t remember anything at all but I don’t like it when you are not with me. I don’t like it when you are not around. I just don’t like it.”

For some reason, for the first time in many years, those words puts Jackson’s mind and heart at ease.

“Are you saying that you want me around?”

Mark blushes. He hopes that Jackson wouldn’t be able to notice it since he was already so red and splotchy.

“En En?”

Mark keeps quiet and hides his face with his hands. Jackson chuckles and tries to pull his hands away from his face.

“Baby? Are you saying you want me with you always?”

Mark wraps his arms around Jackson and hides his face in his chest. Jackson wrap his arms around Mark.

“Baby? Talk to me, please?” 

Jackson was begging Mark. He wasn’t sure if his heart can take it but he was still hanging on to that small sliver of hope that Mark was offering him at this moment.

“I’m saying that, can we start over again from the beginning?”

Jackson wanted to shout with joy at those words.

“Of course we can!” as he carries Mark and twirls him around.

It made Mark laugh and how Jackson missed his laughter. When Jackson finally puts him down, Mark cups Jackson’s face and kiss him chastely on the lips.

“I’m sorry that I don’t remember any of our memories from before. But let’s make memories that I can remember from now on, okay?”

Jackson nods his head vigorously. He couldn’t believe it. Mark wanted them to start over. It was better than nothing. This was going to be a fresh new start for the both of them.”

“What your answer Jia Jia?”

“My answer is yes En En.”

Jackson then crushes his lips on Mark’s, kissing him. He could feel Mark smiling against his lips and boy that feels so great again.

 

They were greeted with claps and cheers by their parents and best friends when they walk back to the event hand in hand.

“Did you remember anything hyung?” Youngjae ask them excitedly which earns him a slap on the back of his head by Jaebum.

“Ouch!” 

Mark laughs and shakes his head. It make the whole group sad for awhile until he speaks again.

“Instead of dwelling in the past, I thought it’s better to look towards the future, right?”

Everybody smiled and engulf both of them in a hug. The Wangs and Tuans was hugging each other on the sidelines. Finally their sons would be happy again.

 

 

Six months later, Jackson was standing in front of the altar all fidgety with their best friends standing there with him.

“Hyung, stop moving. Mark hyung will be here soon,” Bam Bam trying to fix Jackson’s tie.

“That’s right hyung. If you move so much, you might wiggle the ring away,” Yugyeom adds.

Jackson gasp. He panics. He just remembered about the rings.

“The rings! I forgot about the rings!”

“Focus Seunnie! You gave it to me after you had gotten it from the jeweller remember? It’s here with me,” Jinyoung taking out the box to show him.

“Thank you Jinyoungie. Where the hell is Jaebum hyung and Youngjae? I will murder them if they miss my wedding!”

The three of them smile conspiringly.

“Don’t worry hyung. They will be here,” Yugyeom winking at Jackson.

All of them took their places when they heard the song starting. Jackson starts tearing up when he heard familiar voices singing. Jaebum and Youngjae surprised him and Mark by singing their wedding march.

 

_...All I am, all I'll be _

_ Everything in this world _

_ All that I'll ever need _

_ Is in your eyes _

_ Shining at me _

_ When you smile I can feel _

_ All my passion unfolding _

_ Your hand brushes mine _

_ And a thousand sensations _

_ Seduce me 'cause I _

 

Mark was so nervous waiting for the wedding march. His parents was with him and there were tears of joy in their eyes. He knew it was short notice but being with Jackson seems so right. It didn’t matter if he still couldn’t remember their past. All he knew that Jackson gives him this secure feeling and the love was enough for him. After all, they still have a long way to go and he knows that Jackson is the one for him. Regardless of anything.

 

_ I do cherish you _

_ For the rest of my life _

_ You don't have to think twice _

_ I will love you still _

_ From the depths of my soul _

_ It's beyond my control _

_ I've waited so long to say this to you _

_ If you're asking do I love you this much _

_ I do _

 

As he walks down the makeshift aisle down the beach, he could see Jackson standing there at the end of carpet waiting for him at the altar. The song that Jaebum and Youngjae was singing was perfect and he was a step away from bawling his eyes out. Everything was perfect including the weather. It was as if the universe is finally giving them their blessings to be together forever after going through so many tribulations together. It was as if this was their little compromise to the pain that they felt.

 

_ In my world, before you _

_ I lived outside my emotions _

_ Didn't know where I was going _

_ 'Til that day I found you _

_ How you opened my life _

_ To a new paradise _

_ In a world torn by change _

_ Still with all of my heart _

_ 'Til my dying day… _

 

“We are all gathered today to witness the reunion of two lovely people,” says the minister.

 

After that, it was all white noise for Mark and Jackson. They only have eyes for each other. They were both holding each others hands. Mouthing I love you’s over and over again. Jackson especially couldn’t believe that they are in this position. Standing in front of everybody, proclaiming to the world that they are going to be together forever till death do us part. This reminds them of the time when they first confessed to each other and exchange cheesy promises to be together forever. Jackson was brought back to the day that he proposed to Mark properly. 

 

_ It was only two months after that day they had gotten back together at the Rehabilitation Centre. A week after that, Jackson asked Mark to move in with him with the excuse that they could learn more or relearn about each other. It was an easier way for them to get to know each other again after being apart for a few years. For some crazy reason, Mark agreed. Even though he thought it was a crazy thing to do but he felt that it was the right thing to do in his heart. For three weeks, they stayed up together in front of the TV just talking and watching random series on TV. They prepared and cook dinner together whenever Jackson is home early.  _

 

_ At first they stayed in different rooms but one night, Mark climbed into Jackson’s bed. He suddenly felt scared being in his room all alone. All Jackson has to do was to wrap his arms around Mark and he felt whatever fear he was feeling slowly disappeared. Ever since then, Mark never slept in his room again. His reason was, he felt safe being in Jackson’s arms when he sleeps. He didn’t know why. It felt like it was an innate feeling. By now, they didn’t do anything but just cuddle and slept with each other platonically. After that, whenever Jackson kisses Mark on the cheek, he would kiss Jackson back but he would then shyly runs away or quickly leave the room. Jackson felt like a kid all over again. _

 

_ It was after all this chaste kisses and hugs that Jackson knows that he still wants to be with Mark. No matter what heart ache or break he had gone through when Mark lost his memories, Jackson still wanted Mark badly. Now that Mark was giving him positive responses, he felt that it wasn’t too fast to propose. He had already ask mami and papi for Mark’s hand in marriage and of course they gave him their blessings. Now it’s only Mark. _

 

_ Mark on the other hand felt very comfortable with Jackson. Something he never knew that he would feel. He knew that they had known each other since forever but because of his brain injury, those memories doesn’t exist to him. But for some reason, he was drawn to Jackson. He knew that deep down he has feelings for Jackson. It was as if it was there all along, he just had to awaken it or something. So for the life of him, he could not remember if he had ever forgotten that feeling or not. It was weird yet it is not. Mark chuckles to himself. So when Jackson asked him to move in with him, Mark didn’t hesitate at all to say yes. After staying with him, Mark felt at ease. It felt like he had been staying with Jackson since forever, which was probably the case, but for the brain injured Mark, this was something new but it felt comfortable. _

 

_ It was raining that day and it was the weekend. Mark was stationed in front of the TV, waiting for Jackson to bring over the popcorn. They had plan to watch a horror movie that night which Mark had to do a lot of begging to convince Jackson too. They were going to watch The Exorcist. Something that Jackson wasn’t looking forward to. _

_ “Jia Jia, hurry!” _

_ “Hold your horses you psycho. I’m coming,” Jackson says with a joking tone. _

_ Mark grins when Jackson finally brought over the popcorn and soft drinks. _

_ “I’m not sure if you are happy because of me or the popcorn,” Jackson quirking his eyebrows at Mark. _

_ “Popcorn of course,” Mark teases. _

_ Jackson pouts as he plops down the sofa next to Mark. Mark giggles before kissing him on the cheek. _

_ “You are a bonus,” as he blushes. _

_ Jackson felt himself smiling so wide that it might just split his face. He then tugs the blanket to put over his legs and Mark shuffles closer to Jackson, putting his legs over his. It felt really domestic this way. Mark could feel Jackson jumping everytime he hears a weird sound or the special effects. Mark couldn’t help but laugh at Jackson which made the younger pout. To make him feel better, Mark got up and planted himself in front of Jackson, pulling his arms to wrap around his waist. Jackson was able to hide behind Mark. It felt so good to hold him like this again. _

 

_ By the time the movie was finished, Jackson had his arms round Mark so tight that the elder was trying to pry his fingers from him. _

_ “Jacks, something is poking me,” Mark blushing as he says it. _

_ Jackson finds himself blushing too. But it wasn’t his hard on. He was too scared to ever be turn on. Jackson takes a deep breath. It was now or never.  _

_ “Yien, can you please turn around. I promise you, that wasn’t my dick poking you.” _

_ “Oh,” was all Mark says but he was turning red and Jackson could see his ears changing colour. _

_ Jackson dares himself to kiss his ear before turning him around. When Mark was finally sitting next to him and staring at him, Jackson pulls out a small red box from his pocket. Jackson clears his throat. _

_ “I know this might seem sudden to you but I love you Mark. I’ve loved you for all my life and there is nothing in this world that can convince me that I don’t. I loved you then and I love you now. I want to be there for you through the good times and bad times. So, here I am, just Jackson, would like to ask you, Mark Tuan, will you marry me?” _

_ Mark was caught by surprised. He didn’t expect Jackson to propose to him so soon. It had been only two months since they started or he started to learn about Jackson again but he couldn’t find anything that he didn’t like. Jackson even watch a horror movie for him and that it self says a lot. _

_ “What if I forget you again? Like 50 first dates?” Mark ask nervously. _

_ “Then I’ll just be Adam Sandler and court you each and every day. I don’t want to spend another day without you by my side, baby. So, would you please say yes?” _

_ Mark bites his lips. He was nervous. This was real. This was now. This was a lot to take it but he took a deep breath and looks at Jackson in the eyes. He could see the sincerity and honesty in his eyes. But most of all he could see a little fear in it too. Mark felt so loved at that moment because regardless of the fear that Jackson was feeling, he was still willing to give them a chance. He was willing to go through hell and back for him. Mark slowly nods his head. Jackson wasn’t sure if he imagined it, as Mark wasn’t looking at him now. He slowly pulls his head up with his finger and looks at Jackson. _

_ “Is that a yes?” _

_ “Yes Jackson. I will marry you.” _

 

_ Jackson felt all his apprehension leave his body. He was feeling on top of the world. He kissed Mark with all his heart, soul and mind, crushing his lips against his. He was ecstatic when he feels Mark responding. His tongue slowly prods Mark lips and when he opens his mouth and lets him in, Jackson knew he never wanted to not feel Mark’s lips again. Mark feels himself being lifted up from the sofa. Jackson was carrying his bridal style. _

_ “What are you doing Jia Jia?” _

_ “I’m sorry but I am at my limits. I am bringing you to bed.” _

_ “What about the TV?” _

_ “I don’t care about that at the moment. I just know that I want you now baby.” _

_ Mark blushes and hides his face in the crook of his neck. _

_ “Baby?” _

_ “Stop talking and bring me to bed,” he mumbles against his neck. _

_ Jackson chuckles and kiss him on the head and walk towards the room with Mark in his arms. _

 

_ As soon as Jackson got Mark on the bed, he didn’t waste any time and begin stripping him before stripping himself. He knew it wasn’t the most romantic thing to do at the moment but he didn’t care. He would make it up to Mark another day or the next round. All he knows at the moment is that he wanted to be in Mark. As crude as it may sound, he missed being in his warmth and that was all he wanted at the moment. Even in his haste, he made sure he prepared Mark, making sure he didn’t get hurt. He had Mark in a panting mess when the elder urge him to be in him. _

_ “Jacks, stop teasing. I’ll cum even before you get in me,” Mark whines. _

_ Jackson quickly position himself in line with Mark before slowly pushing into the elder. Mark held on to Jackson for dear life. He could feel Jackson holding back. Once Jackson bottoms out, Mark finds himself trembling with pleasure. For some reason, his heart felt full of love for Jackson at that moment. _

_ “I love you Jackson.” _

_ With those simple words, Jackson came without moving and that had Mark laughing. _

_ “Did you just…” _

_ Jackson groans and buries his head next to Mark’s, “That is so unfair.” _

_ Mark chuckles and pets his hair before kissing his head. Jackson props himself on his elbow, not pulling out of Mark yet. _

_ “I promise you that next time, it’ll be better,” as he kisses Mark on his forehead. _

_ Mark smiles and nod. _

_ “How could I ever forget this body?” Mark teases. _

_ Jackson finds himself blushing and getting turned on again. _

_ “Why are you getting bigger all of a sudden?” _

_ Jackson grins, “Cause you said such adorable things to me.” _

_ It was Mark’s turn to blush. Jackson kisses his hands. _

_ “I’m going to start moving now, baby and I’ll make sure that you never forget this body again.” _

_ Mark nods and Jackson begins to movin sensually in and out of him. Soon Jackson had Mark turning into a panting and moaning mess. This time, they took care of each other. They brought each other to climax. When both finally calmed down, Jackson pulled Mark close to him. _

_ “I’m never letting you go this time.” _

_ “You better not.” _

 

 

His attention was brought back to the present when he heard the minister asking him to say his vows. Jackson clears his throat.

“I told you that I would marry you in the future.”

That had everybody in the crowd laughing and tearing up. Especially his best friends that was standing at the altar with them.

Jackson turns to the family and friends that was gathered there for them, “Before I say my vows, I would like to point out that I promised Mark that I would marry him when I was 5. And it only took me almost 20 plus over years to fulfill this promise.”

That had the crowd laughing and crying at the same time. Jackson then turns back to Mark and sticks out his pinky which made Mark laugh. Mark links his pinky with his.

 

“Yien, I love you. I rather have bad times with you than to have good times with somebody else. I promise that I will always protect you and protect the love that we have. I will never again leave your side. This is my vow to you,” as Jackson slips the ring onto Mark’s finger.

 

The minister then turns to Mark and ask him to say his vows.

 

“Jiaer, I promise that from this day on, I will always remember you. No matter what happens from now on, we will go through it together. This is my vow to you. I love you so much. Thank you for not giving up on me baby,” as Mark slips the ring onto Jackson’s fingers.

 

WIth that vow, the both of them had everybody taking out tissues to dry their eyes. Their best friends was thankful that they each were given a handkerchief as part of their outfits.

“With the power vested in me, I pronounce you husband and husband. You may now kiss your husband.” Jackson made a show of wiggling his eyebrows before pulling a giggling Mark towards him and kiss him on the lips.

 

 

The festivities lasted till the night by the beach. Everybody was dancing and eating the night away. Pictures was taken. Videos was taken. According to Jackson, this is so that Mark has proof that he willingly married Jackson, should he forgets him again. That earned him a punch on the arm. Jackson and Mark walks hand in hand down the beach to spend some time alone. Jackson wraps his arms around Mark’s waist, resting his chin on Mark’s shoulder, staring at the horizon. Mark turns to kiss his on his side temple.

“What are you thinking baby?”

Jackson kisses Mark’s neck.

“I’m thinking how lucky am I to marry my first and only love.”

Mark smiles and turns around so that he is now holding Jackson, his arms around his shoulder.

“I’m lucky to be love by you.”

“It is an honour to love you, Mr Wang-Tuan.”

“Didn’t we agree on Tuan-Wang?” Mark quirking his eyebrow at Jackson.

Jackson rubs his nose with Mark’s, “Nopes.”

Mark giggles and kisses him on the lips. This was total bliss. No matter what happens from now on, he knows that they will always be together.

  
  


**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading this. This is my compromise for not updating the other 3 stories. Rest assure, I am writing them. But have now decided that I will update You first once I've finished writing it before posting a chapter a day. This is my distraction to find ideas for it (: @islandahgase don't kill me please....
> 
> Once I've finish you then I'll move on to I Like You and Special Force. Thank you for your patience. Hope you like this story...
> 
> Come yell at me here or my twitter @ObliChyld


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